Player Profile: Brock Landers

Social Personality Traits in 6 words or less…
Artist of Logic, Dancing, and Intrigue.

Goals with game?

Choice in the fact that you don’t have to settle for what just comes your way. Choice in terms of being able to pick and choose from what you want. A lot of people in life don’t have that option.

Where do you usually meet women?
My traditional background is more nightclubs. I like to dance, It’s my Latin blood. I can go to bars and stand around but to me that’s more of a lower energy environment and I don’t function at optimum levels in those places.

How you typically open up in bars and clubs…
I’m not very direct. I learned more when I got into game, more of an indirect game. I do more situational openers. So it’s been harder for me to transition into more direct game. Even though I’ve seen that it works.
I used to do opinion openers but I don’t like them, it feels like a survey. When they have situational relevance it’s stronger.

Do you have any women in your life right now?

I have women that like me, but I don’t necessarily reciprocate. I have this girl in Texas. “I miss you baby.” And this other girl who likes me a lot but she lives too far away.

At a certain point I cut things off. I’m not gonna use her. In the long run it might end up hurting her. I don’t wanna be the one that uses that to my advantage just because I want a cheap thrill.

How has your dating life improved since you learned this stuff?

I’m more aware of my surroundings. The looks that they give me. Everything. I’m more socially conscious in interactions. I’m not just shooting in the dark and seeing what hits.

The more experiences you have provide you with that awareness.

You start to see things clearer. The fog starts to break up.

Your perspective on women…

I always love women. I’m the not the kind of person who solely views them as an object or anything like that. I can appreciate physical beauty but I also understand there’s a feminine energy. It’s soft. Women equals comfort. When you’re a boy, being raised, you fall down and hurt yourself, who helps you feel better?

Beyond the sexual aspect there’s still that motherly aspect of women. They’re caregivers. You may not see it right away but all of them have that side. That’s why you should always to an extent respect them. Because it took a woman to make you. As my friend says, “Goddess Energy.”

An iconic moment that defines your game in a nutshell?

I went to one of those local PUA meetings and then we went out to this club, we couldn’t get in. We were waiting there so long, it was almost 12 o’clock. I left and met some friends at this other place downtown.

I’m gonna salvage the night.

Started dancing with this one girl, and her friends went off to get a drink. I met with them after they got their drinks and kept engaging them. I ended up making out with this girl. I ended up leaving the club with the girl and her friend, and some other guy that was trying to hit on her friend. I could have hooked up with her in the car after I got rid of the other two people, but instead we [explicit sexual details redacted - Ed]. Going from a busted night to a productive one. That was a good one.

Then one time I did direct even before The Game, with this Thai chick. I saw her outside talking on the phone. I just said… “I’m sorry. I just had to tell you you’re gorgeous.” Within a 5 minute interaction I got her number. It went on to be a pretty debaucherous sexual relationship. This girl was a freak. Hot and a freak… We went to the club one time and she wasn’t wearing panties. I knew when I got home what was gonna happen. It was awesome.

Your weaknesses?
Mine is consistency. Sometimes I’m really on. And sometimes I’m weirdly off. Keeping that strong inner game is what I need to work on. Where when you walk into set you’re a god. You can’t just say that to yourself, you have to believe that. Any doubt is gonna be sensed.

Your strengths?
I’m pretty laid back for the most part. I’d say my dance floor game is the thing. Before the game that’s how I picked up girls, on the dance floor. Just the physical, afterwards there was the talking.

Brock’s biggest weakness I’ve seen is inertia. If he’s not on when he gets there, it takes him a long time to get ramped up. Getting to the place late doesn’t work all the time. He can also be too logical sometimes and get caught up in his head. (Getting There Early helps!)

His greatest strength I’ve seen is dance floor game. I’ve seen him pull girls from large groups on the dance floor and make out with them before the group even knows what happened.

I’m psychic. You know why? Early evening I send this text: I figured it out. I’m the only person in LA. This is some I Am Legend shit. Seriously over 20 of my friends here are out of town this weekend.

Later the same night I end up walking alone through the dark cavernous streets of downtown LA with nothing but a ham sandwich to defend myself. (I hate being right.)

Like this, but at night. And no dog.

A TYPICAL NIGHT…

I meet up with a friend of a friend who I don’t know very well but seems cool enough. To save gas and parking fees I suggest we carpool and he drives us out there.

We arrive at a club downtown and he ends up talking to a girl. I go do my thing and he does his. A little while later I send him a text asking “where are you”. No response. Cool, he’s probably with a girl. An hour later I text again. No response. Before the club closes I call him twice. No response.

2 A.M.

I rush out to the parking lot. His car is gone. I ask the attendant if he saw his car leave and he just shrugs. At this point I am blowing up this guy’s phone.

People stream out of the club and as I call and text everyone I know in town, the street gets more and more empty. I picked the worst night to get stranded – I’ve got plenty of friends here who totally have my back, but everyone’s out of town for the holidays. (A $200 cab ride is out of the question.)

I reach one girl who I’ve befriended recently. She doesn’t have a car but she lives downtown. “Hey! I got a place downtown you can totally crash at, but…”
“Cool!”
“I’m actually house-sitting for someone right now and I’m really far away.”
FUCK!

I go into a nearby shop and ask the guy if there are any late-night restaurants nearby. He says I can take a cab to a diner.
On the way over I chat with the cabbie. “I am never carpooling with anyone ever again, unless I really know them.”
“It’s not your fault. How could you know that would happen?”
“That’s the thing. In a weird fucked-up way, maybe I did.”

STALLING

I arrive, and on this corner there are two 24-hour restaurants within walking distance. I gotta stall until I get a hold of somebody. I go to the 24-hour sandwich place and commence the slowest sandwich eating in the history of sandwich eating. I look up from my sandwich and my vision is filled with two piercing eyes staring back inches from my face. A homeless guy is watching me through the giant picture window I’m facing.

Then I go to the diner and eat the slowest breakfast I can eat. I talk to everyone in sight and no one knows anything about buses or transportation. I get a call with one lead – the house-sitting girl knows a guy who lives downtown, and she’ll call when she hears back from him.

I get a pen from the waiter so I can record emergency numbers in case my phone dies. Just then my phone beeps. Shit. I text her: Will check my phone once every half hour to conserve remaining battery. Can’t take any calls, send me texts to keep in touch.

5 A.M.

I ask the hostess if anything else is open, and she says there is another diner down the street.

I step outside into the downtown of one of the largest cities on the continent. Not a living soul is here and the darkness makes the buildings even taller and colder. I’m still wearing the dress shoes I needed to enter the club, not my trusty running shoes. If I have to run for any reason, I’ll be slow. For a block and a half I walk in complete silence.

I get to the diner and order a ham sandwich. By this point I can barely eat any more, and when my food arrives I just nibble on the hashbrowns. I explain my predicament to my waiter, who responds “That sucks man. But try this, you can call 1-800-COMMUTE and they’ll get you where you need to go.”
“That would be perfect, but my battery is almost dead.”
“There’s a station down that way, I ride it all the time. Ask the transit people when you get there.”
“Thanks man.” I map out his directions on an old receipt.

Before I leave I make a crucial decision that probably saves my ass. “Can I get a box for this?”

6 A.M.

During the whole meal I never once see a cab outside, so I decide to walk. Downtown is still dark as night and utterly silent. I get outside and there’s a security guy walking the same way. I catch up to him at a crosswalk and say, “Hey is it safe walking around this time of day?”
He bristles and exclaims “NO” before quickening his pace. WTF? Even a security guy is scared of me right now. This is not good.
“Is the transit station nearby?”
He says curtly “Yes it’s up ahead” before veering off into a parking lot.

I keep walking. It’s still dark outside and the only sound is my footsteps echoing off buildings. I’ve got no phone (it’s off to conserve the battery) and no weapon. Up ahead I see someone leaning against a column. It might be a bum but it could be anybody. When I get closer he stands up. I get a shot of adrenaline. If I have to run back I hope the security guard is still there.

He says “Hey! Are we in Atlanta Georgia?”
I say “No” and keep walking. I veer sideways, away from him as much as possible.
Instantly he is pacing towards me and sputtering “This is Atlanta. Do you know where we are?” while closing the distance.
I say “Really? Have a sandwich!” and thrust the take-out box at his chest. He takes it, confused, as I briskly walk down the street.
I watch him out of the corner of my eye the entire distance to the subway station. The whole time he stands there, mesmerized by the sandwich.

I take the train all the way home.

POSTSCRIPT

Since I wrote this back in December 2009, my perspective of downtown has changed big time. Nowadays I’ve walked home a few times through those same streets late at night without a second thought. Guess a place feels different when you call it home.

The LAND MONSTER.

Your eyes dart across the room… and no wingman in sight. You’re keeping it going with your angel… But a cocktail-dress-wearing asteroid eclipses over her shoulder… and the fate of your pick-up is imminent – EXTINCTION.

Where’s Bruce Willis when you need him?

Going out there and approaching women in the club gets brutal sometimes.. You can face rejection, social pressure, and awkwardness… and so can your buddies. Whether some girl spills a drink on them, starts a fight, or drunkenly steals your friend’s hat and stuffs it into her purse (true story), anything can mess up their night. Here’s how you can get your wingmen back in the game.

But first, I gotta clear up one misconception.

“Let those candy-asses sack up and take care of themselves. I’m out to get laid, not babysit grown men.”

If you’ve got this every-man-for-himself attitude,
A) you’re a dick,
B) When the chips are down, you’ll be on your own. Good luck.

Why rally the troops?

The nightlife is chaos and you never know when you’re gonna need backup. I’ve encountered countless situations where my buddy swooped in and saved the day. And if your buddy’s having an off night, at critical moments he won’t be able to maintain cover fire long before your squad gets overwhelmed.
Also remember that no man is invincible; you will have off nights. If you help your boys when they’re down, they’ll bring YOU back in the game next time you’re out of commission.

What NOT to do

Don’t get analytical and try to solve their sour mood directly. It’ll just reinforce the bad mood. This isn’t the time to get analytical about game either. Talking shop is fun, but at a club it’s counter-productive. Save that for home.

How to boost your squadron’s morale

You gotta build morale in your personal army. I’ve gone ahead and provided some of my personal favorite methods of motivating your friends to help you get girls, along with the Wingman Morale rating.

Singing
Sing the chorus of a popular song that your friends know and encourage them to join in. It doesn’t matter if you’re a good or bad singer, as long as you belt out those notes and belt ‘em like you just don’t care. Examples include Day-Oh, American Pie, Louie Louie, etc. A good time to do this is when you’re traveling between bars (Not man enough to sing? Try freestyling and have your friends beatbox. And if your crew gets a record deal, I’m cool with 10%).

Morale Boost:

Be goofy on the dance floor

If your friends see you dancing ridiculously, they might loosen up. A good example of this: the Patented Eli Butt-Bump

Morale boost:

Get your boys’ back
Braddock wrote about a fun way to assist your wings. Watch your buddy go chat up a girl, and if she rejects him, just boo her!

Morale boost: 

Monkey see, monkey screw
Step out of your group and just open up some girls in front of your friends. If the guys see you do this a few times, they might get motivated to follow suit. If they don’t…

Morale boost:

Call in backup

…tell the girls “hey you should meet my friend, he’s pretty cool” and just bring your buddy into the conversation. Your friend doesn’t have to be a conversational master here; simple chit-chat will suffice.

Morale boost:

Start Early

If your wings suffer from a chronic lack of mojo every time you go out, maybe you’re starting the night too late. Everyone needs time to warm up. Go hang out at a dive bar or something before going to the club. Everyone’s results will improve. I guarantee it.

Morale boost:

“An army is a team”

Armed with these morale-boosting tips your team will be unstoppable. I’ll close this out with one of my favorite quotes from the cinematic manliness epic, Patton:

“An army is a team. They live, sleep, eat, fight as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap. Those bilious bastards that wrote about individuality in the Saturday Evening Post don’t know anything more about real fighting than they do about fornicating!”

***
Her: “Why are we robbing this bank? Is it for a music video?”
Me: “Sure. You’re the getaway driver.”
Her: “Haha!! Wait who are you? Why do I have this?” She’s holding her phone.
Me: “Again, my name is Wrabbit. We’re gonna hang out before you go to San Diego. I’m putting my number in your phone this time.”
Her: “Ok!”

She smiles, then pulls away her phone.

Her: “Wait, how did you know I was going to San…”
Me: “You told me.”
Her: “But you don’t know anything about me.”
Me: “Your dream is to travel to Greece one day and paint on the sidewalk.”
Her: “Oh my god. How did you know that.”
Me: “Um, you told me.”
Her: “You don’t even know my name!”
Me: “Your name is Jenny. We’re from the same small town.”
Her: “Wow! That’s so nice.”  *hug*
Me: “It is.”
Her: “But, um, did we meet before? How do you know-”
Me: “YOU TOLD ME!”

I walk away.

*** Earlier…
Her: “…why am I holding this?”
Me: “That’s my phone genius, you’re putting your number in it…”
Her: “Oh my god. I’m so drunk. This is a new number. I totally forgot it.”
Me: “OK, give me your phone and I’ll put my number in it.”
Her: “Ok!” She opens up her purse and looks for her phone. “What’s your name?”
Me: “My name is Wrabbit, Jenny. This is perfect that I’m meeting you now, my crew will be robbing a bank and we’ll need a getaway driver.”
Her: “Haha!”

She gets her phone out of her purse…

*** Earlier…
Me: “You want to…”
Her: “What?”
Me: “When you go to Greece you want to do … what?”
Her: “Oh. When I go there I want to paint people on the sidewalk.”
Me: “Wow cool. Hey. Are you gonna remember this?”
Her: “Why?”
Me: “Because you seem totally cute and interesting, but I’m having to repeat myself a lot.”
Her: “I’m sorry, I’m just really drunk… um… what’s your name again?”
Me: “My name. Is. Wrabbit.”
Her: “Hi! My name is …”
Me: “Jenny.”
Her: “Oh. Did you know my friend? How did we meet?”
Me: “I came through the ceiling like Batman and landed on you. It was awkward.”
Her: “Haha!”
Me: “We should get together this week. When are you free?”
Her: “Oh, I’m going to San Diego on Thursday. But before that is ok.”
Me: “Cool, here’s my phone, put your number in it.”

She dials the area code…

*** Earlier…
Me: “What’s the number one thing you want to do there?”
Her: “…Where?”
Me: “In… Greece.”
Her: “Why are we talking about Greece?”
Me: *incredulous* “Like five seconds ago. Because that’s where you want to travel…”
Her: “Ohhh! Yeah. I love Greece! When I go there I…”

She trails off…

*** Earlier…
I meet her, and find out we’re from the same small town. We talk about that for a while. We repeat parts of our conversation. I’ve repeated my name once already.

Her: “What’s your name?”
Me: “My name is Wrabbit.” I smirk.
Her: “Oh yeah? What’s MY name?”
Me: “Jenny.”
Her: “Ooo. You’re good.”
Me: “You’ve probably never been outside of LA after you left home…”
Her: “Yeah I have! A few times.”
Me: “So you do go places. If you had a plane ticket anywhere, where would you go?”
Her: “Greece!”

Player Profile: Johnny Rocket

Social Personality Traits in 6 words or less…
clever spacey intellect, dripping with charm

Goals with game?

I like being the social guy who can talk with any woman I want and have absolute ease in social situations. I can use those skills throughout life in my day to day interactions. When you go out to clubs and face these social situations where most guys are so scared they want to shit their pants, and then go to a house party, it’s so easy. There I can talk to anybody and now I’m the social guy.

As far as an ultimate goal, I want to meet a really awesome woman. Ultimately I want to be monogamous. But I don’t want to feel like I had to settle. I want to choose who I want to be with.

How you typically open up in bars and clubs…

I usually open situationally in bars and clubs. Here’s an example. The other night we were walking to this rooftop patio at the club and it was this big cloud of smoke. So I said to the girls, “Isn’t it ironic that you go up here for fresh air and it’s a smoke cloud.” They laughed and the other girl got really into it.

Potential cause of the problem.

Lately I’ve been mixing it up. I mix opinion with situational. So I’ll ask them about the environment. I’ll see some girls on the edge of the dance floor and I’ll open them in mid-conversation.

Do you have any women in your life right now?

Just one.

How has your dating life improved since you learned this stuff?

I dated more girls this year than in the past few years. For one and a half months I’ve had a pretty stable sex life. I completely attribute it to going out and trying. I never had people that were like-minded to go out with. It’s tough when your whole social circle is afraid of meeting new people.

Your perspective on women…

Complicated. There are lots of different layers to women, layers of interaction. I’ve had lots of great times with them. Whether it’s a casual flirt, short fling, or something deeper, you can learn a lot more about yourself and experience some great emotions with them. Women want to feel good and they want a man that makes them feel good. They don’t want to meet a man that’s going to hurt them. It’s tough for them if they’ve been hurt before.

An iconic moment that defines your game in a nutshell?

At a club I opened up a hot foreign girl. I did like a playful cold read on her. It looked like she was playing hide and seek, so I went into a fun playground roleplay. She didn’t know what tag was! So I told her and then we played a game of tag. She grabbed my chest hair so I grabbed her chest back!

She said that her friends said later, “what if he’s a serial killer?” My first text to her was hey it’s your playground romance. Tag you’re it. She was into that. Her friends didn’t approve of me, but I texted her in a creative way that she liked.

Some of your best tips on game, from your experience?

Knowing how and when to qualify has been huge for me. I’d say it’s crucial. It’s the top thing on my mind. Don’t forget to do that because you have to at some point. Also having the abundance mentality helps a lot. Not being driven by the outcome and having more fun.

Self-reported greatest weakness

I don’t feel like going direct is consistent with myself. I also have a problem with cranking up the energy, and sometimes I can feel like I’m too high energy. I can go on auto-pilot. I’m starting to see patterns when I go out now though.

Self-reported greatest strength

I’m comfortable with escalation, and I have a good lifestyle. I also have a good attitude about this whole game thing. Grounded expectations. I don’t take things too personally.

Observed weaknesses

I feel like Johnny’s main problem is related to his greatest strength – he gets into “friendly” mode very easily. He would do much better if he added a little extra seductive edge to his interactions. (LoveSystems Instructor DaHunter’s gold sexualization technique – Sexual Hoops)

Observed strengths

He’s very friendly and laid-back. I’ve gone out with him a few times and hot girls get very comfortable around him fast.

CHOOSING A CAMERA

Cellphone cameras suck. If you haven’t got a pocket point-and-shoot, bottom line, get a Canon PowerShot SD780 IS Digital Elph (Canon IXUS 100 IS in the UK).

Canon PowerShot SD780 IS Digital Elph

If you want to shop around, the following features are important for your purposes:

• does it fit easily in your pocket?
• optical (not digital) zoom
• decent battery life
• decent autofocus
• does it have low shutter lag? (The delay between pressing the button and the picture being taken) Shutter Lag Comparison Chart
• Memory format (I prefer SD cards)

If you want to look professional and go beyond a point-and-shoot, be careful. Some club staff will think you’re trying to muscle in on their territory – many of them have an in-house camera guy. Once you’re inside though you shouldn’t have a problem; in all my years of photography I got threatened by another camera dude only once (When he did I told my MMA buddy Eli about it and the guy disappeared all night for some reason).

Insider tip: To infiltrate clubs I wasn’t officially working for, I used to carry a black Canon Powershot S5 IS. The latest equivalent is this little number:

Canon PowerShot SX20 IS

When it’s off, it’s small enough that bouncers won’t notice or care. But when you turn it on, the lens retracts and the pictures it gets are way more pro than a pocket point-and-shoot.

THIS IS MY CAMERA. THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT BUT THIS ONE IS MINE.

Make a pocket camera one of your pocket essentials that you never leave home without, like your wallet or your keys. That way you’ll never miss a thing. And always, always, before you leave with your camera, do a spot-check – turn it on and take a test photo. If your battery’s low or your memory card is missing or full, you’d better find out NOW, rather than when you’re out and that mega-babe decides to make out with her best girlfriend while showing off her new implants. Near Bigfoot.

GOOD PICS TO TAKE

Pictures are cheap, that’s the beauty of digital. Take pictures of everything – interesting stuff you do, places you go, people you meet. Post the best ones to Facebook.

Specific types of good pictures:

Pics of you with pretty girls (NOT making out or touchy feely with them! That makes you look sleazy).

At the same time, don’t just take pictures of every pretty girl you meet and post them exclusively. Keep the ratio of “pics with 1 girl” to “pics with a dude or 2 or more people” like 30/70 maximum. (One of my friends does this ALL the time, he’s probably reading this blog right now. Yes dude I am calling you out. Easy on the girl pictures amigo! Mix it up)

Pics that tell a good story about you.

Pics showing some of your cool hobbies, places you’ve traveled, or a fun event like a concert.

Pics of you with friends or a group of people, all having fun.

The “All having fun” part is the key. It’s cool to have group pictures, but if the group pictures are always people just standing around it gets monotonous.

QUICK N’ DIRTY GOOD PICTURE TAKIN’

• Always take more than one picture of something. You’ll always end up with a “best picture” out of the group.
• Make sure your horizon is flat and level. (you can break this rule with crazy camera tilts, but you’d better have a good reason)
• Hold the camera fairly still to reduce blurring.
• How to “frame” pictures of people: horizontal pictures – Mentally divide the picture into 3 equal rows like a tic-tac-toe board. Position important stuff so it’s near the corners of the center square. (Canon cameras have a button that overlays a grid on top of your picture to make this easier)
• How to “frame” pictures of people: For portrait-style (when you turn the camera on its side) pictures – give the top of their head a little bit of clearance.

HOW NOT TO BE “CREEPY CAMERA GUY”

Always give people a chance to say “no” to having their picture taken. Depending on context, this can be as simple as saying “Hey let’s get a picture!” while you get your camera ready, or outright asking. Some people just don’t want their picture taken, and giving them an opportunity to say so makes them comfortable.

If anyone asks why you’re taking a picture, just say “I’m a photographer, I like taking pictures.” (if you get asked this question in more than 1 in 4 groups, you’re getting pictures at the wrong time, or you’re taking too many pictures.) If they ask how you got into it, tell ‘em your photographer buddy Wrabbit gave you some pointers :-)

Don’t have everyone stop and pose for photos more than a couple of times, otherwise it gets annoying. If something interesting happens (someone calls for a toast, a bachelorette party shows up) a picture is pretty natural though.

THE SECRET TO AWESOME PEOPLE PICS

When taking nightlife/party pictures of people, the best pictures are not the perfectly staged poses, but when everyone is on a “high note” – when they’re having the most fun. Watch the energy levels. Listen for people hootin’ and hollerin’ and having a good time, then snap a shot.

PICTURE MANAGEMENT

You gotta manage your pictures because the more pictures you take, the more time it takes to organize them, and you don’t want to be shuffling pictures around all day. I use iPhoto to manage and organize my personal pics, the interface makes it easy. It’s got a built-in Facebook image uploader that makes uploading pictures a snap.

iPhoto (and other photo organizer software) gives you an option to delete photos after uploading – DON’T do this. Here’s why…

YOUR IN-CAMERA ALBUM

I always leave a few of my “greatest hits” on my camera’s memory card. These are the pictures that are really crazy or the ones with a great story behind them. You can spin these into conversation material to show to girls.

LEARN MORE

If you want to learn more about exposure, aperture, shutter speed, lighting, etc. there are plenty of good books on photography out there. A Digital Photography for Dummies book should suffice for a general overview. If you want to dig a little deeper, your local community college has photography classes (plus who knows, you might run into a shutterbug babe). Or if you’re already in college, sign up for a Black & White Photography class. Now make some awesome albums.

I’m not gonna lie.

The final reason I even got started writing this thing, the final piece of the puzzle putting this blog together, was…
a woman.

Big surprise huh.

Not just any woman, but an attractive, intelligent, talented *amazing* woman with a good head on her shoulders.

I’m not idolizing this person. She’s really pretty awesome.

And there are countless women out there just like her. They’re not rare, they exist. IN DROVES. Confession: I’ve snooped hot girls’ Facebook friend lists. These lists are packed with hundreds of beautiful women (well, beautiful profile pics at least) just like their owners!

'Whatev dude. That's a MySpace angle.'

Men: What do you do now to bring these amazing women into your life? Or whatever type of woman you’re seeking?

The goal of this blog is to help answer that question. (Well if I don’t get sidetracked with dick and titty jokes anyway).

Here’s a start – the big picture.

Sidetrack: Big Bang or God's Wang?

What is the key to being good with women? Well It’s not about looks. It’s not even about money per se. A lot of dating companies touch on what it takes to be good with women, but everything they teach boils down to 6 simple words:

Be social. Be successful. Have fun.

Simple enough right?

And the thing is, if you master ONE of these areas, you’ll probably get the girl(s) you want, even if the other traits aren’t that great. Keep reading if you want to see a breakdown in complete detail.

Extreme Examples

Social: Frank Abagnale from Catch Me If You Can was a (now-reformed) con-artist and a criminal, but his incredible social intuition fooled even high-ranking government officials, and made countless beautiful women fall for him.

True playa.

Successful: Ruling an empire is pretty high up there on the success scale. Look at the history of ancient kings and most have enough wives and concubines to put Wilt Chamberlain to shame.

Not tonight honey. We have a headache.

Fun: What makes someone fun to be around? It’s all based on positive emotions you bring to others. Look at any famous artist or musician and they’ve got this down – they not only bring the positive emotions that people crave, but they infuse them into words, images, and sound. It’s a strange kind of power that seems like magic. They also get laid like… rockstars.
-

The King.

Now the specifics are what get you.

Be Social

How do you get social?

Leave the house. Talk to people.

If only it was that easy…

There’s plenty of advice out there showing how to be more social in a networking or business context. But what does society tell us (Americans) about frank talk on dating and sex? It’s BAD. Taboo. Awkward. So the conversation goes underground and many guys never find out how to succeed with women. At least now there are some companies out there that fill in this gap (I’ve been involved with one – Love Systems).

Be Successful

“Successful” is relative by the way. I’ve known artists that are dead broke and have an amazing romantic life. Sure they may have no money, but their artwork is inspired. They’re successful in life, not necessarily with money, because they accomplished something admirable that took passion and serious effort.

And if you are focused on making money – sure you can work 80 hour weeks and make mad cash, but how can you enjoy the women in your life with your time-sucking livelihood?

Hoes don't count!

You gotta play it smart. There are plenty of places like The Simple Dollar, and 4 Hour Work Week that will give you methods for spending wisely and working smarter so you have time to focus on what you want in life.

Have Fun

By this, I mean you’re fun to be around, and you’re having fun with dating.

Fun to Be Around

There are many ways you can inspire positive emotions in others. Whether it’s through music or art as described above, a humorous perspective on life, or telling interesting stories, those positive emotions will turn you into a magnet for female attention.
It’s easy to overdo pleasing others though. Follow the show business adage to always leave your audience wanting more so you won’t become the oft-maligned “dancing monkey”. Also be sure to do things for your own amusement too (as long as it does no real harm) so you’re not dependent on validation from others.

Having Fun with Dating

The guys who take dating too seriously are the guys who go home alone. Adopt the mindset that meeting a beautiful woman is a casual everyday thing, and nothing is ever a big deal. Let me reiterate – NOTHING is ever a big deal. Her life circumstances, yours, your sexuality, her sexuality – nothing should ever faze you.

This is the same mindset that men with lots of beautiful women in their lives possess.

This part of it is mental, because you can’t fake it. Dating companies can provide guidance and direction for effective mindsets to have for “Inner Game”.

Finding out More

You could go online for weeks and find every single nugget of information on all of these topics to formulate the perfect plan for improving your game. Or you could be lazy like me and just read a couple of books. Here are some examples:

Be Social:
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazi
Magic Bullets by Love Systems Director Savoy

Be Successful:
Getting Things Done by David Allen
Four Hour Work Week by Tim Ferriss
The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz

Be Fun:
Pulling your Own Strings by Wayne Dyer
The Power of Less by Leo Babauta
My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday
Good luck!

Before I officially launch the player profiles, I’m going to subject myself to the same process the other guys will go through. Sort of like how all cops must get tased before they can carry a non-lethal piece.

Like this. But intentional.

Player Profile: Wrabbit

Social Personality Traits in 6 words or less…
smartass frat-boy Renaissance geek

Goals with game?
I’m looking for my dream girl, and along the way I want to have a lot of wild and crazy adventures.

Where do you typically meet women?

I’ve done some day game, but it’s mostly lounges and clubs.

How you typically open up in bars and clubs…
Most of the time I’m too lazy to think of some line, so I usually keep it simple. If it’s one or two girls I’ll be direct most of the time. If it’s a larger group I say whatever comes off the top of my head which usually ends up being entertaining in a really dumb way. At least to me.

Do you have any women in your life right now?
Yes I do. I’ll leave it at that.

How has your love life improved since you learned this stuff?
Looking back it’s been a pretty dramatic change, though it took a few years and I didn’t notice at first. Keeping a journal helped me track how dramatic the change was.

Your perspective on women…
A lot of guys see this pick-up thing as a battle or some kind of war. This is a big WTF to me. The girl wants sexual intimacy with someone she desires just as much as the guy does, it’s just society or circumstances that subvert this from being expressed. It’s anything but a conflict, it’s about building up something positive with someone who really just wants the same thing. And banging them utterly senseless.

An iconic moment that defines your game in a nutshell?
I once met a girl who made every sentence out of her mouth into a challenge. She wouldn’t believe anything I said. I bounced it right back at her without batting an eye. We dated for a few months.

Some of your best tips on game, from your experience?
Read this blog dummy.

Self-reported greatest weakness

Look! A squirrel.

I’ve got a very short attention span when it comes to women. If a girl isn’t into me fast, I’m out like lightning. This is good on some levels, but I take this to an extreme. My “slow burn” game (a Braddock specialty) suffers as a result, and there are many times where I could have built a connection with a top quality woman if I had just put in more effort and taken things slower.

Self-reported greatest strength
When I’m ON, I can tease and banter with the best of ‘em.

(OK so this is the part where I’m supposed to give my observations of the player in question after seeing them in action. Since I’d rather not try any fake pseudo-third-person mental wanking, I asked a friend to evaluate me here. Here’s what he said)

Observed weaknesses
“[One night] we went out with 2 girls at this club. It seemed at times he was pretty aloof to the girl he was interested in. That came off as weird to them or a bit awkward.”

I was losing interest in that girl. See what I mean? That’s also a hazard of my style of game, as my friend describes:

Observed strengths
“He seems to have a very relaxed demeanor in set. It seems to be very cool calm and controlled. Other people do really high energy stuff and want to be the center of attention. But it seems like his approach is more low-key in general.”

You don’t have to be super-high-energy party guy to do well. You can get a girl engaged in the interaction with normal conversation, spiked with game here and there.

“Dating is  boring. The pattern of interaction or VIBE is normal… normal… normal… SPIKE… normal… normal. It’s not SPIKE SPIKE SPIKE SPIKE like a lot of the internet material would have you believe.”
- Braddock

“He seems very confident going up with the approach. He seems to not really care one way or the other if he gets a negative reaction. It’s good to not feel like you need to be validated by the outcome.”

A lot of this is because I’ve taken Braddock’s advice on Approach Anxiety to heart, especially where he quotes Jim Rohn:

“We suffer one of two things. Either the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. You’ve got to choose discipline, versus regret, because discipline weighs ounces and regret weighs tons.”

“I’m also seen him go direct before. And I think that that’s a strength to be able to pull that off and do that in a relaxed manner.”

Direct game is high risk, high reward. It takes confidence to do well but it’s great if you’re in a rush, and as Jeremy Soul teaches, perfect for day game.

That’s it for our first standard Player Profile… look for more coming up!

Asshole Fact #1: Any population of guys will always contain a small sample of assholes

All right. Let’s take a totally random crowd.

Let's play 'Where's Guido?'

Sure. No assholes yet. But let’s look closer.

Closer...

Closer...

wait for it...

ok maybe this isn't...

ASSHOLE! Oh shit!

From this I conclude that any sample of dudes will contain a minimum of one asshole. Still not convinced? Hell just watch some TV.

Chuck

John Casey

Hot damn, the first episode he almost blew the main guy’s brains out. Perfectly innocent dude. What a dick.

House

Don’t know who I’m talking about? Watch 30 seconds of the damn show.

Community

Jeff Winger

He’s a lawyer. Speaking of which -

Every Legal Show Ever Made

ASSHOLES!

Every Wall Street Movie Ever Made

ASSHOLES!

which brings me to my next point -

Asshole Fact #2: When you gather up a big group of dudes, testosterone outs every guy’s inner asshole to some degree

Exhibit A

Exhibit B.

Exhibit C.

Asshole Fact #3: Like anything else, some guys nerd out on seduction and become weird assholes

The internet proves it. Like Rule 34 for porn, if it exists, someone’s OBSESSED with it. Pick-up is no exception. You’ll see a personality type that’s obsessed with slicing every human interaction into every quantifiable detail (one that I call the Wile E. Coyote in my Looney Tunes Guide to PUA Personality Types). Some sad news for you fellas… turning interactions into scripts is not possible. Sorry. Are you prepared for a -

Girl you just met responding to everything you say with “I don’t believe you”?
24-year-old girl’s MOM showing up at the bar and cockblocking you?
New girl who calls you after ignoring you for 2 weeks asking “I’m in town with my girlfriends what are you doing” at 10pm on a Saturday?

All of these things have happened to me. No I didn’t have a contingency planned. Yes in the end I got the girl, because I made a conscious effort to be adaptable.

There will always be a contingency and if you don’t plan to ADAPT, your whole structure will come crashing down. The only way to build up adaptability is EXPERIENCE. Find out what happens for yourself. And question everything you read (Love Systems Director Savoy on questioning everything), while never taking any of it too seriously.

In the end, PUA instruction is like firearms instruction

The stakes aren’t life and death, but they’re important regardless. PUA websites provide tools that can be used for good or ill. Men will ALWAYS seek tools to improve their odds with women. Guys are horny. It’s how they work. These places can provide training and encourage good behaviour, but in the end, each man’s gotta carry his own piece.

I’m at a casual business meeting at a diner and all these geeky guys are sitting around quiet. So I socialize with them and everyone starts to open up. Don’t get me wrong, they’re not lacking in social skills – one of them shows up with his girlfriend. She’s not a supermodel or anything, but she’s a total party girl. And the most shy, withdrawn, zombie-looking geek of them all drives a Vette with “80 grand of modifications in the engine alone” according to his friend. Not just any geeks… but executive geeks! Geeks with hot cars and fat wallets!

Geeks + money = this.

The last one to arrive has a big pair of shades on his head, and he struts up with a sexy blonde. Did I show up to the wrong meeting? I whisper to party girl, who by now is my instant BFF – “Wow she’s beautiful!” and she agrees.

So Shades guy has one problem, he’s braggy. It starts out tolerable but after a while balloons into obnoxiousness (we got a Foghorn Leghorn here). During any conversation he makes it a point to name-drop every chance he gets.

“Halloween was great. I was VIP at this party where they rented out an entire hotel. So-and-so TV star was there along with so-and-so rock star.” – Shades guy

Call me simple, but that kind of stuff just grates on me. (As they teach in Magic Bullets over at Love Systems, if you’re gonna brag, be subtle about it.) Braggy guy goes to the head of the table and leaves me sitting across from the blonde. Big mistake Pops. If he was less of a dick I wouldn’t have said anything, but now she’s fair game. I talk to her and pretty much just be my naturally charming self :-) which ends up making her giggle and start showing interest.

I gotta get the scoop. “How do you guys know each other?”
“It’s kind of a first date… We met on the internet.”
Huh? “And he brought you here?”
“Yeah it’s kinda weird.” OK, Protip guys: don’t bring a first date to a business meeting.

Also a bad first date.

I get everybody’s number and I just happen to get her number in the process :-) Right away she sends me some flirty texts so we go back and forth a bit, unbeknownst to Shades guy. Now we got a conspiracy going! (One of Tenmagnet‘s insights)

I order a beer and start goofing around, throwing paper airplanes, starting conversations with other tables. Pretty soon everyone else is drinking and raising a ruckus. Just before the rowdiness peaks, the blonde drops a bomb out of nowhere. “I want to know, I’ve got to see this. What’s 2 girls 1 cup?” she asks innocently.

We insist she doesn’t want to know, that NO ONE ever wants to know the horror she’s describing.

5 minutes later we’re huddled around a laptop watching the #1 reason Brain Bleach should exist. Seriously? These geeks went from quiet analytical discussion to binge drinking and horrifying-porn-watching in 30 minutes flat. Conclusion: I’m the devil.

P.S. Oh yeah, Shades guy “bragged” that he worked with the guy who produced 2 girls 1 cup. Double-you-tee-fuck.  I wish I was making that up.