Free PUA Videos Blog

If you want to fill up your Facebook with lots of cool pictures that make you look awesome, you gotta become a photographer. No worries, I’ve listed all the basics you’ll need right here. You don’t have to go pro like I did (though taking college courses and taking nightclub promo photos would help :-) ).

CHOOSING A CAMERA

Cellphone cameras suck. If you haven’t got a pocket point-and-shoot, bottom line, get a Canon PowerShot SD780 IS Digital Elph (Canon IXUS 100 IS in the UK).

If you want to shop around, the following features are important for your purposes:

• does it fit easily in your pocket?
• optical (not digital) zoom
• decent battery life
• decent autofocus
• does it have low shutter lag? (The delay between pressing the button and the picture being taken) Shutter Lag Comparison Chart
• Memory format (I prefer SD cards)

If you want to look professional and go beyond a point-and-shoot, be careful. Some club staff will think you’re trying to muscle in on their territory – many of them have an in-house camera guy. Once you’re inside though you shouldn’t have a problem; in all my years of photography I got threatened by another camera dude only once (When he did I told my MMA buddy Eli about it and the guy disappeared all night for some reason).

Insider tip: To infiltrate clubs I wasn’t officially working for, I used to carry a black Canon Powershot S5 IS. The latest equivalent is this little number:

When it’s off, it’s small enough that bouncers won’t notice or care. But when you turn it on, the lens retracts and the pictures it gets are way more pro than a pocket point-and-shoot.

THIS IS MY CAMERA. THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT BUT THIS ONE IS MINE.

Make a pocket camera one of your pocket essentials that you never leave home without, like your wallet or your keys. That way you’ll never miss a thing. And always, always, before you leave with your camera, do a spot-check – turn it on and take a test photo. If your battery’s low or your memory card is missing or full, you’d better find out NOW, rather than when you’re out and that mega-babe decides to make out with her best girlfriend while showing off her new implants. Near Bigfoot.

GOOD PICS TO TAKE

Pictures are cheap, that’s the beauty of digital. Take pictures of everything – interesting stuff you do, places you go, people you meet. Post the best ones to Facebook.

Specific types of good pictures:

At the same time, don’t just take pictures of every pretty girl you meet and post them exclusively. Keep the ratio of “pics with 1 girl” to “pics with a dude or 2 or more people” like 30/70 maximum. (One of my friends does this ALL the time, he’s probably reading this blog right now. Yes dude I am calling you out. Easy on the girl pictures amigo! Mix it up)

Pics showing some of your cool hobbies, places you’ve traveled, or a fun event like a concert.

The “All having fun” part is the key. It’s cool to have group pictures, but if the group pictures are always people just standing around it gets monotonous.

QUICK N’ DIRTY GOOD PICTURE TAKIN’

• Always take more than one picture of something. You’ll always end up with a “best picture” out of the group.
• Make sure your horizon is flat and level. (you can break this rule with crazy camera tilts, but you’d better have a good reason)
• Hold the camera fairly still to reduce blurring.
• How to “frame” pictures of people: horizontal pictures – Mentally divide the picture into 3 equal rows like a tic-tac-toe board. Position important stuff so it’s near the corners of the center square. (Canon cameras have a button that overlays a grid on top of your picture to make this easier)
• How to “frame” pictures of people: For portrait-style (when you turn the camera on its side) pictures – give the top of their head a little bit of clearance.

HOW NOT TO BE “CREEPY CAMERA GUY”

Always give people a chance to say “no” to having their picture taken. Depending on context, this can be as simple as saying “Hey let’s get a picture!” while you get your camera ready, or outright asking. Some people just don’t want their picture taken, and giving them an opportunity to say so makes them comfortable.

If anyone asks why you’re taking a picture, just say “I’m a photographer, I like taking pictures.” (if you get asked this question in more than 1 in 4 groups, you’re getting pictures at the wrong time, or you’re taking too many pictures.) If they ask how you got into it, tell ‘em your photographer buddy Wrabbit gave you some pointers :-)

Don’t have everyone stop and pose for photos more than a couple of times, otherwise it gets annoying. If something interesting happens (someone calls for a toast, a bachelorette party shows up) a picture is pretty natural though.

THE SECRET TO AWESOME PEOPLE PICS

When taking nightlife/party pictures of people, the best pictures are not the perfectly staged poses, but when everyone is on a “high note” – when they’re having the most fun. Watch the energy levels. Listen for people hootin’ and hollerin’ and having a good time, then snap a shot.

PICTURE MANAGEMENT

You gotta manage your pictures because the more pictures you take, the more time it takes to organize them, and you don’t want to be shuffling pictures around all day. I use iPhoto to manage and organize my personal pics, the interface makes it easy. It’s got a built-in Facebook image uploader that makes uploading pictures a snap.

iPhoto (and other photo organizer software) gives you an option to delete photos after uploading – DON’T do this. Here’s why…

YOUR IN-CAMERA ALBUM

I always leave a few of my “greatest hits” on my camera’s memory card. These are the pictures that are really crazy or the ones with a great story behind them. You can spin these into conversation material to show to girls.

LEARN MORE

If you want to learn more about exposure, aperture, shutter speed, lighting, etc. there are plenty of good books on photography out there. A Digital Photography for Dummies book should suffice for a general overview. If you want to dig a little deeper, your local community college has photography classes (plus who knows, you might run into a shutterbug babe). Or if you’re already in college, sign up for a Black & White Photography class. Now make some awesome albums.

A Grand Unified Theory of Game

I’m not gonna lie.

The final reason I even got started writing this thing, the final piece of the puzzle putting this blog together, was…
a woman.

Big surprise huh.

Not just any woman, but an attractive, intelligent, talented *amazing* woman with a good head on her shoulders.

I’m not idolizing this person. She’s really pretty awesome.

And there are countless women out there just like her. They’re not rare, they exist. IN DROVES. Confession: I’ve snooped hot girls’ Facebook friend lists. These lists are packed with hundreds of beautiful women (well, beautiful profile pics at least) just like their owners!

Men: What do you do now to bring these amazing women into your life? Or whatever type of woman you’re seeking?

The goal of this blog is to help answer that question. (Well if I don’t get sidetracked with dick and titty jokes anyway).

Here’s a start – the big picture.

What is the key to being good with women? Well It’s not about looks. It’s not even about money per se. A lot of dating companies touch on what it takes to be good with women, but everything they teach boils down to 6 simple words:

Be social. Be successful. Have fun.

Simple enough right?

And the thing is, if you master ONE of these areas, you’ll probably get the girl(s) you want, even if the other traits aren’t that great. Keep reading if you want to see a breakdown in complete detail.

Extreme Examples

Social: Frank Abagnale from Catch Me If You Can was a (now-reformed) con-artist and a criminal, but his incredible social intuition fooled even high-ranking government officials, and made countless beautiful women fall for him.

Successful: Ruling an empire is pretty high up there on the success scale. Look at the history of ancient kings and most have enough wives and concubines to put Wilt Chamberlain to shame.

Fun: What makes someone fun to be around? It’s all based on positive emotions you bring to others. Look at any famous artist or musician and they’ve got this down – they not only bring the positive emotions that people crave, but they infuse them into words, images, and sound. It’s a strange kind of power that seems like magic. They also get laid like… rockstars.
-

Now the specifics are what get you.

Be Social

How do you get social?

Leave the house. Talk to people.

If only it was that easy…

There’s plenty of advice out there showing how to be more social in a networking or business context. But what does society tell us (Americans) about frank talk on dating and sex? It’s BAD. Taboo. Awkward. So the conversation goes underground and many guys never find out how to succeed with women. At least now there are some companies out there that fill in this gap (I’ve been involved with one – Love Systems).

Be Successful

“Successful” is relative by the way. I’ve known artists that are dead broke and have an amazing romantic life. Sure they may have no money, but their artwork is inspired. They’re successful in life, not necessarily with money, because they accomplished something admirable that took passion and serious effort.

And if you are focused on making money – sure you can work 80 hour weeks and make mad cash, but how can you enjoy the women in your life with your time-sucking livelihood?

You gotta play it smart. There are plenty of places like The Simple Dollar, and 4 Hour Work Week that will give you methods for spending wisely and working smarter so you have time to focus on what you want in life.

Have Fun

By this, I mean you’re fun to be around, and you’re having fun with dating.

Fun to Be Around

There are many ways you can inspire positive emotions in others. Whether it’s through music or art as described above, a humorous perspective on life, or telling interesting stories, those positive emotions will turn you into a magnet for female attention.
It’s easy to overdo pleasing others though. Follow the show business adage to always leave your audience wanting more so you won’t become the oft-maligned “dancing monkey”. Also be sure to do things for your own amusement too (as long as it does no real harm) so you’re not dependent on validation from others.

Having Fun with Dating

The guys who take dating too seriously are the guys who go home alone. Adopt the mindset that meeting a beautiful woman is a casual everyday thing, and nothing is ever a big deal. Let me reiterate – NOTHING is ever a big deal. Her life circumstances, yours, your sexuality, her sexuality – nothing should ever faze you.

This is the same mindset that men with lots of beautiful women in their lives possess.

This part of it is mental, because you can’t fake it. Dating companies can provide guidance and direction for effective mindsets to have for “Inner Game”.

Finding out More

You could go online for weeks and find every single nugget of information on all of these topics to formulate the perfect plan for improving your game. Or you could be lazy like me and just read a couple of books. Here are some examples:

Be Social:
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazi
Magic Bullets by Love Systems Director Savoy

Be Successful:
Getting Things Done by David Allen
Four Hour Work Week by Tim Ferriss
The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz

Be Fun:
Pulling your Own Strings by Wayne Dyer
The Power of Less by Leo Babauta
My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday
Good luck!

After years of going out in the field and seeing countless guys approach women, I’ve noticed that all players, pick-up artists, average guys – pretty much all MEN experience common waypoints on the road to social mastery, and these traits match up perfectly with, of all things, Looney Tunes characters. No joke. I’ve listed all of them below.

(If you find yourself expressing some of the more negative tendencies listed below, don’t fret. It’s natural for guys at all levels to experience them – I’ve been all of these at some point.)

Jump to a Looney Tunes PUA Type

• Marvin the Martian
• Wile E. Coyote
• Porky Pig
• Yosemite Sam
• Daffy Duck
• Foghorn Leghorn
• Pepe Le Pew
• The Tazmanian Devil
• Bugs Bunny

Marvin the Martian

A thing from another world who doesn’t relate well to Earthlings.

An example of social cluelessness.

Does this sound like you?

Social space case who’s unaware of what’s happening on planet Earth. Can easily come across as arrogant

“The Illudium Pew-36 Explosive Space Modulator! That creature has stolen the space modulator!” – Marvin the Martian

A lot of geekier guys start out this way, and they’ve never done anything wrong; socially they’re just a blank slate. They’re happy to talk about obscure or esoteric subjects, not realizing it bores other people. They haven’t been exposed to other people very much and so they miss all of the cues that one learns with social experience.

Solution

Get social experience! (A guide to getting socialized from The Attraction Forums – written for college students, but it can apply to others as well). Another tip – Underground Dating Seminar program director Brad P.’s tips for social newbies mentions that a Goth Club is a good place to build up social experience because it’s a very accepting environment.

Wile E. Coyote

This starving animal buys every product from the “Acme” company. He analyzes and plans for every contingency… but he never gets the Roadrunner.

A perfect plan… that fails.

Does this sound like you?

Obsessive over details, tendency to see every social interaction as a chess game

“WHY do they always want to do it the HARD way?” – Wile E. Coyote

This guy builds elaborate schemes that are “guaranteed” to get the girl… only to have them blow up in his face. It’s also a natural progression for analytical socially isolated guys – A Marvin can easily become a Wile E. Coyote. Social robots and game-heads can try memorizing and planning for every contingency – but the Roadrunner, or unforseen circumstances, or Murphy’s Law will circumvent them.

“The weirdest guys I know and the guys who have the least success with women are the ones who are overly tactical…they are so in their head thinking about the logical side of how to approach and meet women they end up creating a weird vibe and getting crushed. When you can blend “some” tactics with a great vibe, good things happen.”
- Love Systems Instructor Braddock on Relaxing and Having Fun with Game

Solution

These guys must realize that planning for every contingency is impractical at best, and that becoming adaptable without over-reliance on schemes, routines, or gimmicks is the key to success and a happy, well-adjusted social life. A guy like this will learn way faster by consciously throwing himself into situations where he has no idea what to say next; the mind fills the gaps. Love Systems instructor Cajun sums this up pretty well with some pithy advice – “Trust your brain.”

Porky Pig

A cautious everyman.

Not a perfect example, but I love this clip.

Does this sound like you?

A pushover who’s quick to justify social anxiety

[Porky's cats throw him out of his own house] “Pardon me, but d-d-does anyone in the audience kn-know somebody who kn-knows somebody that has a house to rent?” – Porky Pig

This is a common type. They can carry a conversation, but don’t usually make it very fun or intriguing. If the thought of approaching beautiful women doesn’t turn this guy into a stuttering mess, he comes across as a “nice guy”, and it’s easy for others to walk all over him.

Solution

These guys need to carve out a solid identity. (Love Systems instructor Tenmagnet talks about Identity Part 1 and Tenmagnet on Identity Part 2 ) They also need to stand up for themselves and build some confidence approaching women (AFC Adam Lyons on How to Remove Approach Anxiety).

Yosemite Sam

A hair trigger who take everything waaaay to seriously.

Typical Yosemite Sam Overreaction

Does this sound like you?

Thin-skinned, insecure, quick to anger

[in response to Bugs' "What's Up Doc?"]
“I’m no Doc, ya flea-bitten varmint!” – Yosemite Sam

The slightest provocation from anyone will set this guy off. He’ll treat any girl’s tests as a personal insult, he’ll treat her friends like scheming adversaries instead of normal people having a night out, and he’ll take every social interaction way too seriously.

Solution

Love Systems Instructor Future notes that when a girl calls you out on something, “if you get blown out it’s not because of the material but because you had a negative reaction to rejection.” Future’s advice applies to any form of rejection she might throw at you. Take it in stride, and move on. One of the best ways to build up tolerance to this situation is cold, hard experience. Try going out with the INTENTION of getting blown out, and actively ENCOURAGE the girls to blow you out. You’ll see it’s not a big deal, and you might even have fun with the situation.
“Go up to a group of hot girls and say ‘Hey can you tell me to fuck off’… There, you’ve just been blown out in the worst way possible. Not as bad as you thought huh.” –Love Systems Instructor Daxx on Approach Anxiety

Daffy Duck

A greedy attention-starved opportunist who is always looking out for himself and no one else.

Stubborn to a fault.

Does this sound like you?

Greedy, selfish, conniving, fragile ego

“It’s mine, ya understand? Mine, MINE, all MINE! Get back in there! Down down down! Go go go! Mine mine mine!” – Daffy Duck

This is the guy who ends up being the butt of all the jokes and is quick to exhibit dancing monkey tendencies, all because he bases his self-worth completely on the approval of others. (Braddock’s Golden Rule of Building a Social Circle – Respect first, popularity second. ) This is also the guy who will stab you in the back and steal your girl, because he believes there’s a scarcity of beautiful women out there (Love Systems instructor 5.0 on having an Abundance mentality).

These guys would do well if not for these crippling “inner game” issues. And aside from their sex lives, this attitude will also poison their social circles – high value people are uncanny at sensing hidden agendas and will stay far away from these people.

Solution

These guys have a negative attitude. This can be tough to fix because it touches on deep-rooted beliefs; sometimes it takes a serious kick in the ass to fix them (An example of some inner game tough love from Future). Good habits to cultivate include giving without expecting anything in return, helping others, and brushing off negativity like water off a duck’s back.

Foghorn Leghorn

The barnyard’s biggest loudmouth.

Trying too hard

Does this sound like you?

Tendency to ramble and put on airs, braggart

“You’re nothin but a loud mouth snook!” -Henery Hawk

When guys brag too much about their accomplishments, or just blab too much in general they turn into this guy. They may think they’re making themselves look good, but to everyone else these guys are trying too hard.

Solution

Talking too much dispels any mystique a guy might have. And if he brags, it turns women off immediately. Learning the fine art of shutting up (Love Systems Instructor Tenmagnet describes how shutting up helps your game ) and learning to be subtle when presenting accomplishments remedies this.

Pepe Le Pew

Once he spots his Penelope “skunk”, he’ll chase her to the ends of the earth.

Persistence to the point of obnoxiousness…

Does this sound like you?

Obsessive persistence, unfettered desire

“You know, one of the mysteries of my life is, why a woman run away when all she really wish is to be captured.” – Pepe Le Pew

A woman can drive this guy crazy. And that’s fine… to a point. Inevitably the girl will get turned off and creeped out if a guy keeps pushing it – whether it’s with compliments or with physical touch.

Solution

Guys who keep chasing need to push the girl away now and then. If they keep pulling her in, it’ll scare her off. (Braddock on how to flirt with women using push/pull)

Tazmanian Devil

A voracious tornado of destruction. Literally.

Taz eats anything

Does this sound like you?

Loud, rude, boorish, belligerent

“Tas, Tasmanian. Here it is. ‘A strong, murderous beast, jaws as powerful as a steel trap – has ravenous appetite – eats tigers, lions, elephants, buffaloes, donkeys, giraffes, octopuses, rhinoceroses, mooses, ducks…’” – Bugs Bunny

Wild and crazy party guy. Rude, boorish, belligerent, and above all, DRUNK. He can have a pretty decent success rate, if only because he cuts such a wide swath he’ll likely catch a few helpless critters in his wake. Most of the time though he’ll just scare away every animal in the forest.

Solution

Sober up. These guys have good qualities, but they do way better in normal environments if they dial down the intensity a bit. That being said, they can excel in wild amped-up environments like Spring Break (Braddock’s Spring Break Dating Advice).

Bugs Bunny

Completely unflappable. Always one step ahead of everybody, and sometimes outwits his opponents just for his own amusement.

Nonchalant in the face (butt?) of danger…

Does this sound like you?

“calm, flippant insouciance” – Wikipedia

“Gee, ain’t I a stinker?” – Bugs Bunny

Guys who are calm in the face of adversity, adaptable to any situation, and relaxed enough to have a little fun with social pressure (playfully flippant) are way ahead of the game. They also have the confidence to stick up for themselves in adverse situations. (Cajun’s article on Advanced Body Language: Restraint describes an excellent way to handle challengers) It takes social experience and a positive attitude to get there, but the rewards are worth it.

Solution

For guys who don’t have the Bugs Bunny attitude already, it takes a lot of time and practice to get here. The path to being a real wiseguy requires focusing on field experience, and having fun with the process.

Having a Bugs Bunny attitude covers one pillar of my “Grand Unified Theory” of game. Watch for the “Grand Unveiling” of this theory soon.

So when you go out, which Looney Tunes character are you?